Day 6 29thNov'22. 2:19am Writers block

 I always wanted to write stories, share stories... so much so that my Social sciences class was also story time for me. I remember coming back home and telling mom that today the teacher narrater a story. 

Then we grew up a little more and saw these stories through plays. It got me interested in performing arts.

Slowly steadily I started performing with my sister for tv and sometimes on stage. These stories gave a new confidence when performed on stage or as an audience they gave a very new perspective. Followed with this was my interest in tv and films. From assisting in tv to directing and producing shows and now working as script supervisor. It is a lot of hard work gone into to tell the story in best way possible.

So today when I sit to write anything smallest as this blog. Why do I struggle so much? Why writing a post is making me feel like a writers block... I have seen so much, worked a bit... then why am i not able to put it all on paper. Because writing or story telling isnt a job. It doesnt have any formula. It is an art that  has to come fromt he heart. So dont worry of failing... just try. Write simple, write in flow... The writers block is temporary till You tell a story that must be told. Dont rest. 

One day at a time. Afterall thoughts do take time. Writers do get stuck. Writers block is the first step to go in the right direction to tell your story.

And it is your story. Make it worth telling and sharing. 

On this note. Goodnight ;)

Day 5 28thnov'22 2:13am Ghas by Paash

 

This video has a story. I heard this poem Ghaas many many years back when I had applied for NSD and this came enclosed as 1 of the pieces to be prepared for the test.

Loved it from that time. Infact read more about the poet later. This poem made an instant connect with me.  Though the references are about political senario's in those times and how people will be consciou and the consciousness will take over everything that was once destroyed. 

I felt comfort in remembering this. No almost 10 to 12 years later I was visiting a friend to meet up and read something together. We made random experimental videos. This was one of them and impromptu. May be because i was not prepared but for this one i just wanted to do something for myself and this poem makes me feel just like grass sometime.

Good we made an attempt. It is a masterpiece in poems though not when i recited it. But this again brought back so many memories of confident me...(may be not in the video but trust me 12 years back I was) I remembered that girl from college who just knew how to perform. I felt so good after making and now after posting this video.

Once a performer always a performer. Met & Celebrated that 20's old me today ;)

Goodnight!

Day 4 27thNov'22. 1:51am Hospital Visits - Doctor's blessings

 Last few months have been in and out of hospitals. Started with a day to sit in a hospital for extended family to be in the same Hospital and outside ICU for unknown hours in a month.

I believe last few months were the worst time we saw as a family. My family was visiting me in Mumbai and this time it was for a break... longer than their usual couple of days stopover..

But destiny had something else in store for us. After reaching here our one family member got discharged from ICU and the other got admitted. My husband and mom both fell sick. Husband's desease got detected but mom was diagnosed incorrectly. Where husbands treatment started in time we lost few days for mom and her condition deteriorated. Family physician whom we could not consult earlier suggested emergency and referred a doctor there.

Mom got admitted and the main Dr. from the time of meeting me showed support. He is a senior most doctor and an Icu director. He gadged my attention as he had treated our other family member and I told him my confidence lies in him. he without any thinking exchanged number with me and said he would do his best...as case was already very tricky.

Rest is history as a lot went in a period of a months time. But this doctor gave us amazing lessons. He was confident, proactive, professional and supportive. All this and my moms willpower and family support got us out of the critical situation.

We can't thank the team of doctors enough...and everyone who genuinely stoodby us during this time. From strangers to friends and family members who reached out and showed love and concern for us all. 

I might not say it enough but I am grateful for each one of you to be a part of our life. You guys know who all you are. 

I wont lie, there was a bit of anger and wierd emotions for those who didnt understand the fragile moment we were in and asked or suggested things which didnt feel right. 

But lets not go there, my this time visit turned out to be a happy one when the reports show mom's recovery is on the right track. I felt victory when the doctor too complimented by just saying very good. 

Though the entire process of hospital visit could be very exhausting in itself  but these two words she is doing fine relieves the stress. 

The day followed few tests and a vaccination towards the end. 

The journey in hospital flashes through evryday but its also a reminder now not to take each moment for granted. To cherish time with family and regained my faith in doctors. That good doctors exist.

I have immense gratitude for everyone who helped in moms recovery. Also not a single day pass when i dont thnak god for blessing us... My faith in god stays strong after this episode 

Day 3 26th nov'22. 2:00am Tough gets Tougher

 The day seemed to be never ending but was a productive one. No, I did not create a master piece today but I managed a lot it seems. And this one is not at professional front but at personal front.

There were some extreme crucial times in the family that we had to face. The time seemed difficult or I should say never ending. But as they say when the going gets tough the tough gets tougher.

Today's post is short but it's a post to not break the flow. Just write anything but mostly persevere. in post and life. So today showed some better development in a family members health. 

So cheers to this persons will power and good health and cheers to this short and quick post.

Day 2 Nov.25'2022 2:48a.m. Take Action

The day was full of surprises and balancing acts. Today the day began early. Woke up at 6am and did a bit of skating. I used to enjoy skating as a kid. So much so that I used to climb and come down the stairs while wearing it. Today, the 30 mins practice took me back to that child who was carefree. 

Loved it! Post that a couple of rounds and walk in the complex. It was quiet satisfying. Then read a long long story... Randomly. 

Honestly with just this much I felt satisfied for the day but the day had something else in store. 

Got to meet someone whom I wanted to meet for a long time. whom I love dearly and have grown up watching on big screen and now these days small screen too. Whom I have been fortunate enough to work with. Who inspired me the most. None other than... Oh wait... I can't just give away this detail. Let's keep it for some other day when I won't have much to share.

For now writing about it is too early I don't wanna spill all the beans. Just felt the big you become and achieve more... being grounded, down to earth and humble will take you places.

This day was quite something and made me believe even more in the power of dreams and dreaming big! 

A long detailed post shall follow soon regarding this. 

Additional thing done today - I posted an old video of mine. which I had recorded when I just wanted to create something. with some courage I posted it up online sometime back. Not a big deal for sure. But just that after very long I gathered courage to put it out there. Feels like a bit prepared to show what's in there to the world out there. 

The other self awareness that happened - I had noticed earlier I used to write blog only when I used to be upset or the heart and mind used to play games. Today the heart is content. Just as the day has come to an end. I have immense gratitude for the life and tough times I got to deal with so far else I won't have felt grateful for today. 

This much for now. Talk to later ;)

Day 1. Nov24'2022 01:40am. Your Impact On Other People - Learning from the best!

 After almost 2 years resuming to write a post.

In these 2 years Gained a lot of experience and got the privilege to learn from the best in the industry and otherwise. 

Not only the last couple of years years but last month too was an experience in itself. 

Why to talk in rounds when I can share in short. So basically this post is the beginning of what I learnt from the best (Mr. Amitabh Bachchan sir). It was during the shoot of Goodbye (film 2022 release) that I got the opportunity to work with some of the best talents. During this time got to know how punctual, perfectionist and passionate , the man is and how he does work hard even after so many years in the industry. No doubt like many I was in an awe of what I was witnessing. While others see and assume how he is. I was getting a chance to show my expertise and work along with him. Honestly I should have been intimidated and won't lie to some extent I was but more than that I was hungry to learn from the best. Even the smallest skill I would be able to imbibe even that would be enough. 

So one of the things that touched my heart was Mr. Amitabh Bachchan's down to earth nature, him giving letters to the people who touch his heart, him tirelessly signing the autographs for all of us and especially sending it to office in my case. 

Honestly I never dreamt of working with him someday. I became a fan of his in the process of working. One day I got to know he had posted a picture of mine with him on his Tumblr account. I thought its a prank that the crew is playing on me but oh boy! there I was on his page... making a quick entry with a picture of mine and a caption without name being referred as continuity person. 

That picture and post made me follow his posts everyday. I realised how he enters a small post even after a tiring day and today learning from the best but lazy and late in applying it in my life. I am beginning my journey again with this post to write each day without fail, Even a line or a thought but I want to try how tirelessly one persevere a thought and make it a practice and then habit and then routine. Unlike his posts not many would be interested in knowing what I think, write or feel about. But I want to try try... Max to max I would fail but I would be happy that I tried.

  

Ghazal

Kaash main tumhe dikha sakti
Jo sapne main aksar dekha karti hun
Hote ho tum bhi usme kabhi
Ek dost ban kar,
Ek hamdard ban kar
Wo sab ban kar jo main chahti thi
Tum bano mere par
Tum reh gaye wo sabak ban kar
Ek ghazal ki tarha
Jise main zindagi bhar gaa sakti hun
Par bhula nahi sakti